Top 10 Best Things About Having Leo Home

10. Jammies all the time!
9. Dinner can consist of cereal and leftovers and that's OK.
8. On Demand napping.
7. Kangaroo Care in the comfort of home.
6. Little squeals.
5. Knowing what time it is based on feeding and pumping schedule alone-no clock needed!
4. The best excuse to hibernate ever.
3. Listening to him sleep.
2. Learning what he needs...slowly but surely.
1. He's home! And that's enough for us.

Here are a few pics from the last couple of days...we're not really sure what day it is at this point...our time consists of sleeping, feeding, pumping, napping, holding, feeding, pumping, etc., etc. And we love it!

Settling In

It's a very odd feeling to know that we no longer have to make the twice daily trek to Swedish. It's odd in an "oh my god I'm so happy that's over" kind of way. Leo's doing great at home and Jay and I are happily settling into somewhat of a routine. Leo's been making it fairly easy on us by going 3-4 hrs. in between full feeds and sleeping pretty soundly in between. We have to pester him a couple of times a day outside of that for his "meds only" feeds but we're figuring things out and I think we'll have a reasonable routine in place over the next few weeks.

Leo's also sleeping really well. I dno't know if this is just lingering preemie behavior or if we'll actually be this lucky with him. When he's out, he's out. The kid is so quiet when he sleeps that we're constantly walking back to his crib to be sure he's breathing. One caveat to the quiet thing is when he's working out his poops and/or gas. He's a grunting machine. And as soon as he realizes he's hungry the cries begin in earnest. It's virtually instantaneous...he's silent and one second later - WAAAAAH. But overall he's really mellow...we hope not "too" mellow medically speaking but for now we'll take it.

We've been trying to injest as much food into him as is possible. He's taking 2-3 ounces per feed with some 1 oz feeds in between to wash down the myriad medications he's on. Oh the meds. I had to enlist my brilliant sister to devise a thorough spreadsheet so we could track all of his meds and feeds. It's a little nutty. I'll be much relieved when those are done and all we're doing is mixing up his special blend of milk...which, according to the pediatrician will likely continue for a few more months. So just about the time most women start to ween their baby from nursing and introduce solids is when I can move to all nursing...um, what's wrong with this picture? Sigh. Oh well, I at least get to nurse a couple of times a day as it is and Leo does pretty well with it and beyond that he's getting my milk 50% of the time so I guess I can't complain too much. But I do look at the formula tin as this giant buzz kill. But I know it's giving him the added nutrition he needs to grow - blah, blah, blah.

We had our first trip out of the house since Wednesday today! Off to the doctor's we went and Leo did great in his car seat - sleeping the whole way. And he did very well for the doctor too. It was so surreal to be back at Swedish but not going to the NICU or ISCU to see Leo - we had him with us! And we were going home with him! We get to do that now!

And the dogs are being wonderful. Beans is a nervous wreck but listens to us dilligently and jumps off of the bed or sits/stays on command if he's getting too close to the crib for comfort, etc. Henry is a little more daring around Leo, he wants to sniff him up one side and down the other and would sleep with him in the cosleeper if we let him...both of them would do that actually. But they're being really sweet and listening to us AND so far neither has pooped or peed in the house so I think I'm going to call that a success at this point. Let's hope it lasts.

I think I hear a nap calling my name, will post more pictures in the next couple of days.

Home!

We're home!!! The Roulston Clan is officially home at Casa Roulston, together at long last. The last 48 hours have been a blur and it's hard to believe that after 9 weeks - 64 days - in the hospital it's all come down to this. Jay and Leo hanging out on the couch right now while I type away on the computer nearby. The dogs are hanging out on the couch too, snuggling beside Dad. And Leo has already slept comfortably in his crib this afternoon, taken two full feedings and one of his many lighter "med" feedings - that's when we essentially force feed a little extra milk disguising a myriad of medications that he's still on and will be for at least another month.

We already made it through our first "oh my god" moment when we took his temperature after coming home and let's just say he wasn't warm. So we bundled him up in a double swaddle (see below pictures), a hat and cranked up the heat in the house. A couple of hours later he was back in the safe zone. Phew. And I have to say, this is when I'm thankful that our house is so small. Because I can just lean into the hallway from the kitchen and see that he's breathing OK in his crib. Really we're never more than about 5 steps from confirming that he's OK. And this is good for our sanity.

We're trying to get the hang of all of his medications and how best to give them to him especially when he's not yet on a fixed feeding schedule AND when the dosing times don't line up with when he's been eating. Awesome. But we're figuring it out, and the little mini-feeds a couple of times a day seem to be working.

I will say, however, that the rooming in experience and the discharge experience were not quite as joyous as maybe we had hoped. The rooming in experience was really fine, we didn't sleep much but we managed to get a tiny bit of sleep. Leo did really well for us so there wasn't much going on other than us trying to learn how and when to feed him. But our nurse was brand new to Leo so there were definite gaps in understanding in terms of what his patterns are, etc. Combine misunderstandings with no sleep and you get lots of frustration. But nothing major, just annoying. Discharge was another story. I don't know why hospitals are so bad at this! For all that they do so well, discharge I think is universally a bad experience. You have to wait around forever - either for a doctor or the pharmacy or whatever. In our case all of the above. And a slight emotional breakdown on my part when the pharmacy claimed the insurance company was telling them that Leo wasn't on my policy. So I proceed to try to find my insurance company's phone number after I had left my card with the pharmacy so they could call them back to double-check - but of course I was oging to double-check too because I didn't trust the pharmacy chick. Sigh. It was, as usual, a misunderstanding on the part of the pharmacy. Turns out Leo has a name and it isn't "Baby Boy Roulston." Well at least we know that my insurance company is vigilant about fraud!

And after that we were out the door around Noon...oh wait I forgot my breast milk in the freezer! So I run back upstairs while Jay takes the car out of the parking garage and I load up a huge shopping bag with all of my frozen milk and hope that it doesn't start to thaw on the ride home. It didn't. And I always forget something. Always.

Then it was home where our loyal and loving pooches were patiently waiting for someone to let them out since it had been since yesterday at about 8 p.m. when they last were let outside by our wonderful neighbor. Poor guys. They didn't miss a beat and showered us with love regardless of our abandonment. Then they proceeded to be very sweet and gentle with Leo. Jay held Leo while letting the boys sniff the bottom of him all swaddled up. They sat and stayed on command and came in to check on this new creature Mom was fussing over in the crib. Henry has long claimed the guest bed in that room as his own and I don't think anything's going to change that. He will now simply be keeping an eye on Leo for us while he snoozes across the room.

So we're settling in fine it would seem. I'm sure there will be scary moments ahead and sleepless nights...many sleepless nights. But so far so good and Leo is doing tremendously well and seems at ease in his new surroundings.

So now it seems this blog switches to a plain old boring parenting blog! But hopefully will still provide some laughs for folks. And we'll be sure to chart Leo's progress here as well. Thanks to everyone for your ongoing love and support. We could not have gotten through these last two months without it and that is NOT overstating things. We feel incredibly lucky and grateful. Oh, and Leo just said Hi.

In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...

Leo's coming home Wednesday! THIS WEDNESDAY! As in 3 days from now!!! We just got the word late this morning. Presuming nothing calamitous happens in the next 48 hours, he's all ours starting Wednesday morning. We're going to do our overnight "room in" on Tuesday night and then that's it. See ya later. Nice having you here, but now it's time to go. My head is spinning. I can't believe it's going to be here already...already, as in 9 weeks later. But still! We've gotten so used to everything that it's really almost overwhelming to think about him being home! What do we do with him? When do we change his diaper? Before he eats? After he eats? When he wakes up? How exactly does this whole parenting thing work?

So he's off the feeding tube, as reported yesterday, and doing great on his on demand feedings. I think he took upwards of 70ML at one of his feeds earlier this morning. Craziness. AND he's off the oxygen! They took him off of it yesterday afternoon and he's doing great so far with it.

So we'll just be normal, boring, crazy parents of a newborn in another few days. Nothing special anymore. Can't wait. We will have lots of follow-up doctor's visits, to figure out the kidney issues and anything else lingering. But it's all outpatient stuff at this point and nothing that's keeping him from going home.

So I'll be heading outside in a few minutes to do some last minute gardening/weeding (cause who knows when I'll do that again!!) and we're installing the car seat today (car seat test for Leo will be tomorrow likely), and we're wrapping up a couple outside projects as much as we can too. And making a run for nipples...never thought I'd say that...cause I have lots of bottles but forgot the nipples. Awesome. And, and, and.

Stay tuned for what I'm sure will be several frenzied posts about our impending change in parenting status here over the next few days...Yay Leo!!

T Minus....

First off, I have to make a side comment. Jay and I watched Avatar last night (I didn't see it when it was out). And I have to say, it wasn't awful! It was actually entertaining and the effects were quite spectacular. So that was a pleasant surprise. I will say, the dialogue was fairly painful. But good nonetheless. Ok, onto today's update.

Leo is now on "on demand" feedings. No, that doesn't mean he can download movies to his crib...it does, however, mean that he no longer is fed automatically every 3 hours. He is now fed when he's hungry! Imagine that! Just like a regular newborn. So it could be every 2, 3 or 4 hours. They won't go more than 4 hours even if he hasn't been making noises that he's hungry. So as a result, they've removed his feeding tube since each feeding now needs to be on a nipple of some sort. This is a very big move for him because if he does well this is the fast track to high-tailing it out of there and on home. It's conceivable now that if he does well he could, in fact, be home next weekend on his due date.

He was also weened further on the oxygen front today. So he's on the lowest whiff possible before they shut it off altogether. Hopefully sometime this week he'll be off the O2 altogether. Yippee!!

So this means that Jay and I will be doing our "room in" overnight training session sometime this week...presuming he continues to do well and doesn't have a setback. Let the learning (and comedy) begin. So this is where Jay and I sleep over at the hospital, Leo's in our room and we take care of him all night, as we will when he's home. The nurses are there for emergencies only. Training wheels if you will. This could be any night in the next few days. It's all just fast and furious now. And all because we asked! It's funny what happens when you start to advocate for your care. Crazy. I just happened to mention today to the nurse "what would happen if we went off of the protocol and went to on demand feedings?" And she said "well, I think we could do that. How about starting today?" Um, ok. Thanks for proactively offering there chief. Sorry, putting away the snark.

And here are a few more pictures from this morning. Check him out in his newborn sized clothes!! The preemie stuff doesn't fit anymore. Craziness. He's all of 5 lbs, 10 ounces now. Slowly getting towards 6. Go Leo!

Grumpy Pants

I was kind of a Debbie Downer in that last post. Not that I'm any less anxious to get him home than I was this morning but I had a great visit with Leo this morning which helped ease my frustration a bit. He took nearly a full feed from me for the first time! He's taken full bottles but not a full feed from me yet. So that was a big, big achievement for the little guy. Yay Leo!!!

I also ran into the Mom of Leo's NICU buddy and it was great to talk to other parents who are feeling the same frustration we are about how slow it takes to get these guys up on full feeds and home. So we had a great chat about the whole thing and that helped too. So I'm feeling better, not as grumpy, and now the house is being cleaned and that always makes me happy - particularly when I'm not the one cleaning. Wee.

Impatient!!!

I feel like a little kid who can't wait to open their gifts on Christmas. I'm so, so, so DONE with the hospital. They're wonderful and they saved Leo's life and have given him all the support he needed to grow - blah, blah, blah. But I'm done. I want him home. I don't want to drive to and from the hospital twice a day. I want to give him a bottle at home. Without wires. I don't know why all of a sudden the impatience has come on like a ton of bricks this morning. But it's here and it's not letting go and I'm trying very hard not to be frustrated and annoyed that things aren't moving along quicker.

The nurse practitioner told me yesterday it's unlikely he'll be home by his due date. I didn't push to find out when she thinks he'll be home. I'm just trying to be hopeful that it'll be as close to that magical May 29 date as possible. He's a slow mover. A deliberate boy it seems. He's taking his time getting up on his weight and learning to eat. He's doing really well, but he's taking his time. And unless he has a crazy growth spurt and eating jump this week he's gonna need more time to get ready to be home. And of course I don't want to rush it...I just want it to be here already. And I'm also trying not to turn into the annoying Mom in the ISCU who thinks she knows better than the nurses..."why aren't you trying to feed him more overnight? Give him another bottle, he can take it!" It'll happen soon enough I'm sure. And things are good so I'm happy for that. But for a control freak who plans everything in her life, I'm hitting the wall.

Ok, enough of this - off to the hospital! Sigh.

Getting Ready

Leo's weekly labs came back and things are still looking great. His direct billirubin level continues to come down. He's at 3.6 right now - down from upwards of 6 in weeks past. Ideally it'll be at or around 0 so he still has to get it down, but we're moving in the right direction. And he's making lots of red blood cells, again good. All in all he's leveling out nicely. He just needs to pack on the pounds. The doctors would like him to have another 1-1.5lbs on him so that he has the strength to really thrive on all fronts - breathing on his own, eating, etc. He's at 5 lbs, 6.8 ounces today. So we just have to continue to be patient.

And I learned today that 90% or more of the kids who make a visit through the NICU and ISCU go home eating a mix of formula and breast milk. Leo started on a combo of formula and breast milk a couple weeks back to help with his billirubin levels and his weight gain. There are added quantities of fats, calcium, phosphorous, etc. that breast milk doesn't have that these guys really need. So it's not uncommon for them to be on a mixture of the two (or exclusively on formula) for months. So we'll be doing lots of mixing and measuring when we get home. I think I thought he'd be exclusively on breast milk once he was home, so this is somewhat frustrating, given my supply is staying really high. When you work so hard to get your supply up and then you can only use it half of the time, it's a little annoying. But, as with all things related to this experience, it's for the best and all will work out.

We had a visit from the speech therapist yesterday who helped with some suggestions for more optimal feeding positions for Leo. Seems odd that a speech therapist would be telling us how we should feed him, but when you think about it, it makes perfect sense. She's focused on how his mouth is working - how his tongue is laying down in his mouth, the strength with which he's sucking, how wide he's opening his mouth, cheek strength, etc. And it really does make a difference for these little guys how you hold them during nursing or bottle-feeding. If their heads are too far back they'll be more strained in their breathing which can cause them to desat or stop breathing or just work harder than they should which will tire them out which means they won't eat as much as they need to for growth. Again with the simple equations. So we're trying sort of a modified football hold with Leo. We hold him tucked against our side with his feet essentially under our arm and his body in line with his head - but on his side, not his back. So if he gets too much milk it'll just pool in his cheek, not rush to the back of his throat. And at this morning's feeding I have to say he did awesome with me. I already noticed a difference in him not having to work as hard and therefore being able to take more. And we noticed it last night too at his bottle feeding. Hooray! Hopefully this technique will help him bulk up a little quicker - and get him home sooner!!! It's all about getting him home. We're so excited we can hardly stand it. Scared...but mostly excited.

And now...as promised, some new photos. These were from the weekend, some of Leo and Momma, and one that makes us laugh - Leo being burped: close-up! It's pretty funny stuff when we do that to him.

Countdown

So I probably shouldn't be in countdown mode...I'm destined to be disappointed...but I can't help myself. The nurse practitioner yesterday suggested that Leo should be home by his due date...that's in two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Of course she can't guarantee anything, and it's all up to him to get his eating skills up, and he might come home with the oxygen tank if he still needs a bit of a boost there, but still. The fact that they're actually giving us some sense of a timeline means good things. They don't offer that stuff up unless they're confident. And commence happy dance.

So now begins our frantic work to get the house ready...not the basement, that ship has sailed and we'll get it done when we get it done. My guess is when Leo's 10. Just kidding. I hope. But just getting the little stuff in order - assembling and installing and checking the car seat, getting the co-sleeper/bassinet set up, making sure our diaper and other supplies are fully stocked (thanks to awesome friends and family I think we're good!), fix stupid little things upstairs like the creaky bedroom door and slow shower drain, etc., etc. Can you tell I plan things for a living? I'm going into full PR Launch checklist mode. I think somewhere over the past 8 weeks we forgot that time marches on and, as suspected, the possibility of him coming home is upon us before we even knew it. This is a good problem to have!!! But still...let the obsessing begin.

Oh and we met our pediatrician yesterday. She's great. Kind of high strung/crazy, but in a good way. The way that really smart and capable people are. And, interestingly, she balances said crazy with a remarkably down to earth and low-stress approach to treating kids. Because after what we've been through with him, we don't need a high stress doctor. We talked about our fear and expectation that we have to basically keep Leo away from everyone and everything for the next year. And she told us that just wasn't so. Yes we need to have some common sense, if Aunt Susie is hacking her lungs up, for example, we probably shouldn't bring little Leo around. But having folks visit, taking him places (not the mall during the first month, you get the idea), and even possibly our original plan of in-home daycare down the street (vs. scrambling to find a nanny) should all be fine. Again, within reason. So she painted a very different picture of our immediate future with Leo than we had in our heads from the NICU staff. Which makes sense I suppose. The NICU is supposed to be more conservative, etc. - that's why they do such a great job with the babies. But we don't live in the NICU and it sounds like we don't have to make ourselves crazy or miserable worrying about exposing Leo to stuff. She definitely thinks that having the summer months for him to get stronger and grow, ahead of flu season, will be hugely helpful. YAY!

Jay just fixed the slow drain in the shower - check! And now we're off to see the little guy. And it's sunny again. ONWARD!

Sunshine

What a stretch of weather we're having! I sound like an old lady...but it's really great!!! So I'm blogging from the back deck today...amidst the thriving Leo Tree and tomato plants and herbs and petunias and, and, and. Leo's FIVE POUNDS!!! WOOT! He's filling out all over and his direct billirubin levels continue to come down! So his liver and gall bladder work! Hooray!!! So now all we're really working on is eating. He hasn't had any breathing events in 11 days (that's one of his two criteria for going home, eating's the other) so now it's all about getting him off the feeding tube and onto a bottle or boob for 8 feedings a day. He's taken a full bottle here and there, but nothing consistent yet. He just has to keep growing so he gets his strength up so he has the energy to eat. And that takes time. A very simple equation really.

Last night was infant CPR class, and man was it worth it. I highly encourage every new parent out there, grandparent, caregiver - whoever - to take it. Really helps you feel more confident if, heaven forbid, something should happen. Tomorrow we meet our new pediatrician, and at some point here in the next couple of weeks we need to install our car seat and have it checked out. It's crazy how fast 7 weeks goes by and we're really seriously starting to talk about when Leo gets discharged...it's really going to happen! And probably fairly soon! Craziness!

Tonight it's wild salmon on the grill. Ah yes, this is why I moved here. I remember now. Happy Thursday all!

In Training

I feel like everyone in the family is in training for Leo coming home...especially Leo! He will continue to learn to nurse and eat more and more on his own, ween off his oxygen, get over this urinary tract infection, rest and grow. And he's doing a great job at those things. He took nearly an ounce this morning from me...he's only done that well on the bottle so far, so it was a great development. And he's up to 4 lbs, 14 ounces today. Closing in on 5 lbs! And no breathing events. So he really is doing great. Leo training - check!

The dogs are also in training for Leo's homecoming...they just don't know it. We bought a training tool to get them to stop the nuisance barking they are so very good at. And all I can say is...awesome. It's a small speaker-looking device that sits in the living room on top of our bookcase and is plugged into the wall. When it's on, it picks up on any barking within a 500 square foot range and emits an annoying sound only the boys can hear. I plugged it in this morning for the first time and I haven't heard a peep out of them all day. Dog training - check!

And Dad's in some training as well...we're trying to get the snoring under control before little guy is snoozing next to us in the bassinet. And my wonderful husband agreed to try what is essentially a mouth guard that pulls his jaw forward to keep the airway open so that you don't snore. It's pretty funky, but it works! And I love that he's willing to try. Dad training - check!

So the next logical question is what am I doing to get ready for Leo? Nothing because I'm perfect! Ha, just kidding. I'll need to come up with something...maybe the pumping can count as training? Yeah that's it. Momma training - check!

And it's sunny today, so this is making me happy. I love looking out the window and seeing the Leo tree and all our other potted veggies and herbs. It's really starting to feel summery, and I'm getting more excited each day for when the little man will be home. Yay!

New Beginnings

Day one in the ISCU! And...it's pretty much the same as the NICU! Just kidding...but I do have to say that one of the things I was struck by this morning as I strolled into the second floor to see our guy, was how different and yet familiar it all felt. The ISCU (Infant Special Care Unit) definitely feels more like a "ward" - not quite as cocoon-like as the NICU. It's bigger, more spread out, and it's not uncommon to walk into one of the multi-bed rooms and not see a nurse. So in that sense, it's somewhat of an adjustment. But at the same time, this is all good stuff because it means that Leo doesn't need the constant care and supervision of the NICU. He can hang out in his crib, on his own without incident. So from that perspective, I actually like the ISCU better. It's easier to allow yourself to believe - really believe - that things will turn out OK and he will come home soon. Of course there are no guarantees, but just getting out of the intensive care unit does wonders for our perspective.

AND, today's update is that Leo took another full bottle last night! So now he's up to three "nipplings" (sorry guys, that's what they call it!) a day. This is really his big focus now that he's in the ISCU - getting up on his nipplings (i.e. either a bottle or a boob) so that he's fully off of the feeding tube. Cause he can't go home with the feeding tube. So this is all good progress. And, he's up to 4 lbs, 13 ounces! Getting close to 5 lbs everyday. That's like normal baby size! Yippee!!!

First Mom's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there, not the least of which is my own. As my brother pointed out to me, one of the silver linings of this whole Leo coming early thing is that I get an extra Mother's Day out of it! And it was one heck of a first Mom's Day.

First off, Leo moved down to the ISCU today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's now a resident of the second floor, moving onto his next phase of growing before finally coming home. The staff had been telling us it was coming for days now and when we showed up this morning at the hospital we got the big news, that it was happening today. And to make it even better, Leo had an amazingly good feed with me and then went on this afternoon to take a full bottle for the first time!!!!!!!!!! Can I get a woot?! Here's a couple of photos of today, Grandma Nancy came out from Spokane for the weekend and got to hold him this morning.




And then, it was back home where my amazing husband gave me the best possible first Mother's Day gift I could imagine. Jay got us a tree...not just any tree, but a gorgeous Coral Bark Maple that we've been wanting for a while. The tree is Leo's tree, Jay says. We can look at it and watch it grow and become healthy and beautiful, just like our little guy. Needless to say this sort of thoughtfulness makes a crazy post-partum woman get a little weepy. And all I can say is that my husband rocks. And I cannot wait to watch this tree, planted in an old wine barrel, grow and thrive in our backyard for years to come...not unlike a certain little boy.

Happy Mother's Day, and here's to the next phase.

700 and Counting!

Faithful readers might remember my tails of woe over my sad milk supply back in the early days following Leo's birth. Well I'm pleased to report that the Fenugreek (herbal supplement) seems to be doing its job and slowly but surely my supply has been increasing. I just broke 700ML the other night!! Ideal supply is 750ML or more per day (that's a bottle of wine) so we're feeling very relieved that at least this one aspect of new parenthood is going the way we hoped.

Leo keeps learning on the feeding front. He's doing better and better each time with both me and the bottle. And we're still hoping to get him down on the second floor any day now. It really is an "any day now" sort of thing - he's on the short list so hopefully very soon we'll start the next phase.

Oh, and a correction from the other day...Ms. Nelson's Missing! That's the name of the book, not Ms. Nelson's class. Silly me. That's all for now.

Patience Is a Virtue

And I don't have much of said virtue. Sigh. I talk a lot here about the need for patience with life in the NICU. And it's true. And sadly this is not an area in which I excel. So it's been doubly hard for me to maintain perspective, appreciate the current situation with Leo as positive and not constantly be obsessing with what's next and when it's going to happen. I plan things for a living so my mind is always moving to what's next. So that's where I'm at this week - preoccupied with Leo moving to the second floor. And it's unlikely that's going to happen this week. Well, I shouldn't say that - who knows if it'll happen this week. Ask three different people in the NICU and you'll get three different opinions. So we'll see. It might not be until next week, and that's fine. I need to remind myself of that. But when your kid is, by all accounts, ready for the second floor you just want him to move down there. Why are we waiting??? But I need to relax a bit, enjoy the fact that he's not the sickest one in the unit anymore and we'll get downstairs when we get downstairs. Lord knows we'll be down there for a few weeks as it is, so there's plenty of time!

So that's what I'm thinking about today...oh and my friend in surgery, I can't wait to see her tomorrow and am distracted today with thoughts of how things are going. I'm distracted by a lot lately. I think this must surely be normal. Ok, good.

Holding Steady

So I've had a couple requests for pictures of the crazy eye makeup lactation lady. But knowing my luck she'd see it and sue me for something. SO, we're gonna have to picture this one in our brains. Does anyone remember the book "Ms. Nelson's Class" - I think that was the title. It was a book from our youth...those of us from the 70s/80s...about a teacher trying to get control of her class and she dresses up as a crazy witch of a substitute teacher to teach her class a lesson about how good they have it and therefore not to misbehave. Ok, so the weirdest of the lactation lady...the one with the bad eye makeup...looks exactly like the bad Ms. Nelson in that book. Her hair is black and grey and thinning and all over the place - think fingers in light socket. And the eyebrows are painted on with really too dark eyebrow pencil. A color not occurring naturally is all I'll say. And then the too pink lipstick that's slightly askew. Perhaps some blue eyeshadow in there as well. So that's the picture. It's a nice one right? Combine that with a slightly condescending and frankly sort of insensitive approach with patients and there you have it.

Ok, enough of my bitching and moaning. Leo is doing great! His direct billirubin levels finally started to come down this week. They're still elevated, but they're lower than they were last week which is a big win. So they're still running tests and sending cultures to Children's Hospital in Cincinnati, etc., etc. But so far nothing conclusive still and the fact that the levels went down this week is definitely a good sign. So the investigation will simply continue.

And Dad got to feed him with a bottle today! That was pretty fun, Leo did really well on the bottle...still milk from me, but just in a bottle. The plan for his feedings moving forward is to try to get him to 1-2 good nursing sessions a day along with another 4-6 bottle feedings at 90% or more...meaning he takes 90% of the bottle or more. It's likely that when he leaves the hospital he'll be doing only 1 or 2 nursing sessions a day with the rest via bottle. It's going to take him months to get to full nursing. Slow and steady continues to be the mantra.

And hopefully we'll get down to the second floor here in another day or two. There's nothing keeping him in the NICU at this point medically, just the line in front of him of the full term babies that make a brief visit to the NICU right after birth for something minor and then move downstairs for a day or two and then go home. Or, as I like to call them, the babies that should give parents some perspective. Sorry you kid had to visit the NICU for a day or two but...come on. So we'll just wait until they're ready, no rush. He's doing well and that's what matters. We're thankful beyond words for the progress and can't wait to start the next phase...it's going to be easily another 4 weeks down there. Maybe sooner, but I doubt it. Slow and steady!!!

Time to pump. Over and out.

Lazy Sundays

Leo had a lazy day too. His temperature is holding steady outside of the isolette so that's great, looks like he made that milestone without issue. His feeding is still going fine, but today he wasn't all that interested in working for his food. He also tossed his cookies after his feed...but I think that's cause Jay and I were trying to put him back in his crib ourselves (this is much harder than it sounds with all the various wires and gear) and I think we caused an upchuck in the way that we (and by we I mean I) had his head a little too far bent down and his tummy bent a little too far up. This holding babies thing is hard.

And now it's home improvement work...just doing some painting touch-ups in Leo's room, Jay's pounding away in the basement. And so it goes. Side note, I'm watching the Mariners game as I write this and just saw the most disturbing ad for the Snoqualmie Casino...has anyone else seen this? Who wears a cocktail dress to the casino? Much less around here. Oy.

Ok, so for this week let's keep the beads out for Leo graduating the NICU, his Sunday night labs should tell us more about his gut issues. And beyond that, we're just hoping for no hiccups in the road. Second side note, we put jammies on Leo today that had feet on them. The feet were frogs. AWESOME.

A light

I almost don't want to write it down. If I say it out loud it might not happen. But, even the nurse practitioner was talking about it today so I think I can start to believe it. Leo might be graduating from the NICU this week. "Second floor material in a couple of days," was how she put it today. After nearly six weeks in the NICU we might actually have our first light at the end of the tunnel. Today they were talking about getting him out of his isolette and into a crib. Maybe by tonight when we go back. Twice a day boobfeeding sessions were suggested. Talk of how to manage this and that when we take him home. It's very hard to wrap our heads around all of this talk of progress, next steps. When you're overwhelmed by the day to day details of just trying to be sure he's stabilized, the thought that he's now possibly ready to move on to the next phase is crazy. But in a good way.

Did I mention my truce with the stupid lactation ladies? Well, I've decided they aren't so bad now...except the one with the crazy eye make-up, she's just nuts. But there's a really nice one who helped me out with Leo's initial nursing session earlier this week. She was normal, not crazy, and very knowledgeable. So, lactation ladies, I say unto you - thanks. Maybe you're not so bad. See, progress on all fronts. Go me.